That’s my main goal this year.
Last year, I made it my mission to simply believe in myself. I realized that I needed to work on my self-esteem. I needed to begin to view myself in a new light and believe that I was capable of doing everything I put my mind to.
You see, I am one of those people who can quickly spew out reasons someone else would be good for a specific task or position. I will tell them how beneficial something would be for them and reassure them they shouldn’t be nervous.
But when it comes to me, eh, not so much.
I will literally try to talk myself out of it because let’s face it, it’s easier to not try, but I have done that in the past. I learned that doing that doesn’t silence that annoying voice in your head that says “you can do better” and “you can be better.” There is something so powerful about realizing your potential. Nothing silences that voice except rising to the occasion and attempting the seemingly impossible.
I won’t lie and say that it’s not scary because it is, but as a reminder, I quickly changed my passwords to some variation of the phrase “believe in yourself.” Don’t worry, I have since changed all said passwords. It’s something simple, but every time I typed it in, I had to reflect on that statement even if it was for a couple of seconds.
This year, well, maybe the next couple of years, I have to believe past fear. I stole the phrase from my pastor because it completely sums up what I have been feeling and thinking since the New Year.
One of my main concerns has been planning a wedding. Ever since I got engaged, everyone has asked me the date and to be honest, it’s hard to even want to think about it when I fear I won’t be able to financially contribute to the cost. I want to. I have to and to do so, I will have to make some changes.
I know myself well enough to know that I am a control freak and there are certain things that I just can’t control right now. On the other hand, there are some things that I can control and to do so, I’ll have to work smarter and harder. I’ll have to make sacrifices and I’ll have to continuously step outside of my comfort zone. I know there are going to be a lot of tests and challenges along the way, but I am ready.
This year, I need my belief in my Higher Power to be stronger than my belief in any negativity or ill thoughts. And I need my belief in myself and my abilities to far outweigh my fears.
This is going to be a good year!
