I’ve made a habit of counting my blessings every morning by saying a prayer and listing things I am grateful for in my life.
It’s the first thing I do after turning off my alarm and forcing myself not to look at social media.
I began doing it after reading The Secret and I am confident that it’s helped shift my perspective.
But every once in a while and I know how ungrateful this is about to sound, I question whether this is it.
Right now, I am working as a server and while I never thought I would go back to that after graduating college, I really like the job.
I like that it gives me a schedule.
I like that it allows me the opportunity to make my own money and pay for my wedding, which was a huge concern and one of the main reasons it took so long to start planning. Now the issue is just selecting the details, but I am getting there.
I like that it’s also has made me comfortable with making what I call “my big girl move” in getting my first credit card and that’s exciting to me.
However, lately, I find myself thinking that there has to be more.
There just has to be.
And because I’ve made a habit out of counting my blessings, these thoughts kind-of makes me feel guilty for even allowing them to cross my mind.
A friend told me to be careful with thinking like that for the same reason you should be careful what you wish for.
Plus, it’s hard to say that you are grateful for something if you are always looking for the next big thing. I get it.
Call me hard-headed, but I just can’t help but question is this it?
